Welcome 2013...Forward We Go!

I can't believe it's 2013...it feels like 2012 just flew by!

My last post was kind of negative, but I'm generally a positive person, so I bounced back pretty fast. I woke up the last two days in a better mood and had a good day at the gym yesterday. I'm ready to start the new year right!

Looking back, 2012 was a pretty good year for me! My best friend Jen threw me a surprise birthday party, I went on an awesome camping trip to Big Bend National Park with Bob and Amy, my friend Erica and I won a grant to go to Italy and Portugal for 3 weeks, I got into photography and took a picture a day for almost 8 months straight, I rocked as a presenter at two education conferences and a 4 hour professional development at my school, I opened my Etsy store, I started running again and committed to a healthier lifestyle, I completed three 5Ks and two 10Ks, and I lost 22 pounds! Whew!

Lisbon was my favorite place I went this summer! And since we won a grant the whole trip was free, which makes it even better!

The other day, I wrote about my word of the year - NOW. It took me until August to really get serious about getting healthy, but I'm glad that I finally did! This year I wanted to keep it simple again so I chose the word FORWARD as my theme for 2013.

I have a healthy momentum going, so I need to just keep moving FORWARD!

Forward with my dreams, forward with my goals, and forward with feeling more awesome everyday!

Source: tumblr.com via Kristen on Pinterest

I'm not really sure that you can really see the difference in 15 pounds, but here I was in my first race of 2012 (August) and yesterday in the same outfit.

Of course in the race picture I look kind of weird because I was running toward the finish line...my neck looks huge! It took me 5 months to lose those 15 pounds! That was probably the most frustrating part, but I think I lost more inches and gained muscle in that time than I lost weight. I went down a size in jeans though and fit back into pants I haven't worn in 3 years! Thankfully I think my body has adjusted and I'm starting to lose more actual weight.

So what's on the agenda for 2013? Other than being active and healthy, who knows! Right now I don't have anything big or any trips planned...and I kind of like it that way. I'll just take the year as it comes!

Here are a few of my SMART goals for 2013: (SMART=Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, Time-Bound) 

• Lose 80 pounds. That would get me back in the healthy BMI range. I know it is going to be tough, but I'm up for the challenge! Ideally, I'd love to get to my goal weight which is somewhere around 150-160, (between 84-94 pounds from now), but I'll settle for getting to a good BMI.

• Complete 12 races in 12 months! I've been doing one a month since August and I've loved every bit of it! I can't wait to repeat my races this year and see how I've improved!

• Run a 5K in 34 minutes and a 10K in 1:15.

• Complete the running bridge series in my area - Kemah Toughest 10K, Galveston Toughest 10K, and La Porte Half Marathon. This year I did the Kemah race and did better than I anticipated...4 passes over that bridge was tough! I was signed up for Galveston last year but I had a horrible sinus infection so I had to skip it. 

• Do at least one adventure-type race. I'm an outdoor girl and don't mind getting dirty! I did the Beach Dash this year and it was super fun!

• Gain some upper body strength. I'd like to be able to do 20 real push ups and maybe even a few pull-ups!

• Start practicing yoga consistently, at least one time a week.

• Join one of the running clubs in my area.

• Take a pole fitness class. I'm pretty sure I can rope some of the girls into that one.

• Go skydiving!

Source: myfitnessgoal.tumblr.com via Melody on Pinterest

There you go...my goals for the year! Anyone else have any super fun goals?


Until later, happy living!
Jamie

Getting Past Limbo

I don't know why every year I want so badly to have a great NYE, but I do. I can only count a few good ones I've had in my adult life and last night definitely wasn't one. It's not that it was BAD, but it just left me feeling crappy and reminding me how long of a way I still have to go. I wanted so badly yesterday to celebrate my accomplishments this past year - losing 22 pounds, starting running again, completing a race a month since August, and generally feeling better about life. In fact, I left the house at 9pm to meet my friends with a positive attitude.

But for one reason or another, I let a pity party creep into my head when I was out and found myself sad at home at 12:30, thinking about all the things I don't have that I desperately want. The worst is I've convinced myself that some of those things I want, like having a happy relationship, aren't possible at this weight so I don't even try for them. I have almost 90 pounds to lose to get to my goal weight, so I kind of feel like my life is on hold right now, in limbo, until I get most of that weight off.

I know that's not a healthy mentality and it's not how I really want to feel, but it's so hard to snap out of that feeling! And by the way of course this happened which fueled the fire:

Needless to say, I promptly untagged myself. What sucks is that (when thinner) I am super photogenic and love taking pictures. As I have put on weight over the years, I have taken fewer and fewer pictures of myself. OR, really I only post certain pictures that I take because I know how to take them myself and pose to look thinner. Sometimes it definitely makes you feel left out of life. I have traveled extensively over the last 5 years and don't even have pictures of myself in some of those awesome places! That's sad...

When I woke up this morning, thankfully, some of those feelings had subsided, BUT some of them were still there and that scares me. I have dealt with depression for a long time and I know feelings like that have the power to push you forward or derail you and throw you back into your little black hole. But I know that I don't want to go backwards. I'm so glad that I have had 5 solid months of commitment under my belt to this new healthy lifestyle and that I'm not one of those people scrambling because it's January 1st. Being where I am now allows me to better brush off that crappy feeling I had last night and move forward. The one positive think I did was didn't waste any calories last night on alcohol and comfort food!

So I'm trying to move onward and upward this year, to get out of my limbo, to have a better body and a better body image, but it is still hard and it is a struggle everyday. All I can do is surround myself with positive people and keep working hard. Eventually I will get where I want to be through determination and dedication, and on the next January 1st I know I will have more to be proud about.

So if you are one of those January 1st people, have the confidence to know that you can do it. I have mine, even if it doesn't shine so brightly all the time.

I wish everyone a happy new year and a most excellent 2013!

Until later, happy living!

Jamie

Looking back on 2012...

So I haven't mentioned it here before but I have a (semi-defunct) craft blog that I kind of lost interest in this summer as I really got serious about my health and weight loss. Here is the post I wrote last January that I wanted to share...

MY 2012 WORD OF THE YEAR

This was the first year that I ever heard of people choosing a word of the year instead of a resolution. So I thought long and hard about what I wanted my word to be and now, 16 days into the new year I finally decided…

My word of 2012 is NOW. Yes, just plain now. I read blogs where other people chose fun things like sparks or bubbles. I wanted mine to be fun and creative too. So I kept thinking about it.

I tried to find something fancy. I started with the word determination (because that’s what I want to have more of this year) but I didn’t like the ring to that. So I put determination in the thesaurus and came up with the word spunk. I was like “Sweet…I would say that I am spunky!” Well, after googling spunk and coming up with many questionable images, I discovered that apparently in British slang spunk means semen…needless to say spunk was out.

So I thought and thought. And then I decided I needed something simple, something that describes what I want for myself. And it was now.

I should probably explain that I wasn’t so grounded as I am right now in my life. I’ve moved around a lot since college, always searching for the right thing. The right job, the right place to live, etc. My cousin Matt once told me that I am always looking toward the future, something better, so I never get to enjoy what I have now. It’s like that Ferris Bueller quote…

Ferris was totally right! And so was Matt!

I haven’t shared much of my personal life with you all, but the last 4 years have been very rough for me. One day I will share the details, but basically I went though several traumatic events in a short period of time. And, I really wasn’t sure at the time if I was strong enough to get through them. Looking back I don’t know how I ever did….but I’m so glad that I did. I feel so incredibly lucky to have so many wonderful people in my life that were there to support me. Without them I definitely couldn’t have done it!

Sometimes life just doesn’t turn out like you planned and you just feel lost and stuck…but the time is NOW to do do something about it! Well, at least my time is NOW!

So in my early 30′s I’ve had to start over from scratch. I’ve had to find a new direction and try to figure out for the first time as an adult who I am and what I want. In some ways, I have more than I knew I wanted…but in other ways, some things are definitely missing. NOW is the time to fill in those gaps.

NOW is the time to be healthier and fit and finally feel good about my body.

NOW is the time to learn how to love myself more and criticize myself less.

NOW is the time to finish what I start.

NOW is the time to do all the things I always wanted to do…especially if I am afraid.

NOW is the time to have more fun and laugh more often.

NOW is the time to stop talking and start doing.

Instead of being sad about what I don’t have, NOW is the time to figure out how to make it happen, while appreciating all the things that I do have.

It’s like one of my favorite quotes…

Source: giniethepiratequeen.tumblr.com via Jamie on Pinterest

NOW is the time to live my life and not wait on the future anymore…whatever it may hold!

So hopefully in 2012 these three little letters will help me in my quest to grow and change and be more who I want to be. Good luck with all your goals in 2012.

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So that was me almost a year ago...how time flies! On my next post I will tell you my new word of the year and tell you how I did with my 2012 word.

Until later, happy running, 

Jamie